Down The Rabbit Hole She Falls!
by CMemlovr
Summary: Emily is sitting bored stiff at her best friend's wedding, when she falls through a rabbit hole and finds herself in wonderland. Is this all just an elaborate fantasy, or has Emily really found herself in Wonderland? Based on the book and film.


Emily Prentiss was bored. She was bored because she had been forced to attend a wedding reception, okay so it was her best friend's wedding reception, but it didn't make it any less boring. Tired of hanging around doing nothing, and getting hit on by a very drunk SSA Derek Morgan, she stalked off. The reception venue was beautiful, a grassy field with trees and a meadow, yet, there were all of these large rabbit holes that she kept tripping in. As she was walking she saw Morgan being sick in a bush, she smiled with delight. Morgan getting payback, so far was the best part of her evening. Except for the lovely scenery, she just couldn't get over how great the scenery around her was. She continued walking, pleased at the chance to get some fresh air.

Suddenly a white rabbit in a top hat and tails appeared before her carrying a stopwatch, she scurried towards the rabbit hole Emily had just stumbled on, and as she passed Emily by she could hear the bunny mumbling to herself "I'm late, I'm late, oh deary me! I'm late!" Her interest was piqued by the odd rabbit, and the fact that she could walk, talk and was fully clothed. Not to mention the fact that the rabbit hole seemed far deeper now than moments ago. Curious as ever, she followed the strange little rabbit, and managed to fall into the hole.

Dust fell from everywhere, and, as Emily looked up, she could see the surface from where she had fallen. She tried to call for help, but it appeared that nobody could hear her. Since she was feeling a little bored anyway, she decided to continue her adventure, and took a step forward. To her astonishment, she fell through the ground with a mighty crash, and found herself in a big room, full of tiny doors. She stared around her in amazement; she'd never seen such tiny doors before. She wondered how the bunny had managed to find its way through. It had been an average sized rabbit, so how had it fit through such a tiny door? Too big for any of the doors she decided to peep through one, to get a glimpse of what was going on behind the minute portals. Inside was a charmingly miniature meadow much like the one she had just fallen from, and to the back, the odd bunny she'd been following. Now that she looked closely, the Rabbit very much resembled...Seaver!

"Ashley? Seaver, is that you?" Seaver looked at her with frightened eyes, then her eyes flicked towards the pocket watch that seemed perpetually glued to her hand.

"Oh my! I'm late! I mustn't be late for the Heartless Queen, she gets ever so testy!" and off ran Seaver, now anxious to meet the Heartless Queen, whoever she was.

Still trapped in the room with tiny doors, she looked around her for a way out. Having found none, she continued to explore the oddly shaped room. The room itself is somewhat of a dome, encircled by miniscule doors. In the centre lies a small table, and she walked over to it, curious to see what the table holds. Upon it lies a piece of cake labelled "EAT ME" and a small bottle labelled "DRINK ME" . Next to them is a small golden key, which she presumed opens the door she wanted to go through to get back to her friend's wedding reception. Grabbing the cake and the bottle,she took a swig from the bottle first. Suddenly she shrank down, so small that she couldn't even reach the table top! If only she'd thought to grab the key on her way down. Figuring that the cake must be the growing solution, she took the smallest of bites, and grew so large that she could barely fit into the normal sized room. As gently as she could, she picked up the now minute key, took a swig of the shrinking juice, and came down to size with the doors on the floor. Feeling proud of her achievement, she surged forwards to open the nearest door, which responded to her yanking of his door handle.

"Hey princess, what do you think you're doin'?" A familiar face appeared before her eyes once more. It looked familiar, and there it was. The face of Derek Morgan!

"Morgan? Why are you a door in this elaborate fantasy of mine?"

"Elaborate fantasy my very sexy butt, princess. I'm a door 'cos I got the muscle to keep unwanted people out! Now, for the love of all that is good, please stop yanking on my knob!"

At this Emily giggled. "Your...knob?" she choked out.

"Alright princess, all you gotta do is put that golden key in this golden lock and you're in, okay?"

"Okay. Sheesh Morgan, no need to be so condescending."

She shoved the key in the lock to stop him from talking, and turned it as fast as she could, thinking that finally she would be on her way home. Alas, no.

Emily found herself in a narrow corridor, the floor of which was covered in small puddles. Seeing that she was going to get nowhere near her friend's reception anytime soon, she quickly flew into a rage. Swearing like a sailor, she began to fume, causing the corridor to fill with smoke. Annoyed with the smoke, and the fact that she was hopelessly lost in what appeared to be some weird underground universe, she decided to sit on the floor and ponder her options. Beside her appeared a small, coloured fan, one that she would be most likely to find in Garcia's tech cave. Grabbing it, she thought she might use it to bat away the smoke. Instead, she found herself shrinking even smaller! Cursing once more, she began to run through the smoke, now unsure if she was even in the corridor anymore. She sprinted down the corridor, now alley, until at last, she could see the end of it. A dark and misty place, the end looked far less welcoming than the beginning. Once she'd reached the place where she'd been headed, she stopped a while to catch her breath, and came upon an odd looking blue caterpillar seated on a mushroom and drinking coffee. The Caterpillar was scrawny and longer that any one caterpillar is normally. He had boy-band hair, and seemed addicted to the brew inside his coffee mug.

"Ah, yes, you must be Emily. Would you like some coffee?"

"No thanks...since you know my name, what's yours?"

"I am the Reid Caterpillar, resident genius of Wonderland."

Emily chortled, she couldn't believe this. First, Derek as a door, and now Reid as a _caterpillar?_ "Well -"

"Dr. Reid please, there are three PhDs, and I do not like to be known without them."

"Fine. Dr. Reid, would you please tell me how I can get back to where I've come from?"

"That depends on where you've come from. Where have you come from?"

"I-I can't remember."

"Too bad really." He said as he started to move off of his mushroom and away from Emily. "Just in case you need it though, one side of this mushroom makes you large again, and one will make you smaller, help yourself to both sides"

"Thanks Reid."

The caterpillar slunk away, leaving Emily all alone beside the mushroom. Feeling that she needed to be prepared for what was to come, she grabbed several handfuls of both sides of the mushroom and stuffed them into her pockets. She walked onwards, now extremely lost and finding the manner in which the trees hung extremely creepy. Feeling vulnerable at such a small height, Emily decided to bring herself back up to a more appropriate height; she took a small bite out of the growing mushroom, which caused her head to magnify to ten times the size of her body. Swearing and cursing, she took a bite out of the shrinking mushroom, and with a bit of effort managed to get herself to the right height at last. She continued strolling, now more confident with the boost her height had given her.

Along the way she began to grow tired, and stopped to sit on a gnarled tree stump. She stared up at the weird looking trees above her head, and spotted a ghostly grin hanging above her. Seeing this, she called up to the grin, "I can see you y'know." The grin transformed into a plump, eclectically coloured kitten, with a very large grin.

"I know you can see me gumdrop" she smiled.

"And who would you be?"

"I am the all knowing, all grinning, Cheshire Kitten, Garcia."

"Of course you are. Can you help me get out of here?"

"Oh... I don't know cupcake, to be honest, I'm enjoying watching you. It's quite humorous."

"I bet it is. I would expect this of Morgan, Garcia, but not you. Say, do you two have this whole elaborate prank planned out or what?"

"Or what, this isn't a prank sweetie. Now off you go." And so disappeared the Cheshire Kitten, her grin still hanging in mid-air.

Walking is getting tedious and Emily decided that she'd had enough. She climbed up the tallest tree she could find, cursing her mother for not allowing her to partake in this sort of activity when she was younger, and peered over the treetops, trying to find some sign pointing her to home. Quite frustrated with not finding anything, she slid down the tree branch again and continued pacing forwards. At last she came to some sort of castle, where two men dressed like cards were painting white roses red.

"Hey, Card-men, why are you painting those lovely white roses red?"

"The Heartless Queen told us to, and if we don't then we'll get fired." They turned around to face Emily. Staring back at her from the faces of two Jacks were Rossi and Gideon, both looking slightly ashamed at their attire.

"Who is this Heartless Queen I've heard mentioned so often?"

"Her name's Erin Strauss" Said Rossi

"And she happens to be our boss" Reminded Gideon sternly, "so unless you want to get fired, I'd suggest we continue painting" Both men turned back to the flowers they had previously been painting. Emily rolled her eyes in disbelief, since when did Rossi and Gideon actually start obeying Strauss? Emily looked around nervously, for she had no wish to meet the Heartless Queen, or as she preferred to call her in her own mind, the Dragon Lady.

Growing bored of the endless parade of odd people, she looked around for someone more sane, and came across a small table not far from the residence, where it appeared a group of people were having a tea party...with scotch. Seated at the head of the table was a man dressed in old fashioned attire, with a large top hat that seemed rather worn, and a suit that was full of moth holes. "sit." Commanded the man, "you're late for drinks." Emily took a seat next to the strangely dressed man, and feeling quite uncomfortable grabbed a scotch and downed it in one. Now that she had some drink in her, she'd begun to recognize her unit chief, Aaron Hotchner.

"So what's your name Hotch, in this crazy shenanigan?"

"My name is the Mad Hotchner, Hotch for short."

"Riight. So, Hotch, why are you drinking Scotch in the middle of the day?" asked Emily.

"Well you see" he replied, "in this part of the woods, the time has been frozen to always be seven o'clock at night, the end of a case, and therefore the time to break out the scotch."

"I see, you wouldn't mind pouring me another one would you?" begged Emily, desperate for another to end this crazy nightmare.

"I'm sorry but no, you're on a case."

"I am?" she asked.

"You are. So get on with it, go!"

Setting off at a run due to his abrupt change in demeanour, Emily soon found herself at a smallish cottage that seemed relatively normal on the outside. Sure that this was the place where she had a case, she knocked on the door to speak to the victim's family. A slow shuffle could be heard from behind the door, and standing before her in the open door frame was the Duchess, JJ, and her son, the baby, Henry. She was at first unrecognizable, but slowly Emily realized that the person standing in front of her was none other than Media Liaison, JJ.

"J.J., I came on a case, is everything alright?"

"Who's JJ?" she asked, "I am the Duchess, and this is my son, the baby."

"Ok. Is everyone alright Duchess?"

"No, I need you to take care of my baby while I attend to matters with The Heartless Queen."

"Sure. You know I'd be more than happy to take care of Hen- I mean... the baby."

"Very well. Take him and go inside." She dropped the bundle into Emily's hands and left her house as quickly as Emily had come. Emily, thinking that she'd finally get some normalcy, peeped into Henry's blankets, only to find a squealing pig! She dropped the bundle abruptly, surprised at the turn of events. Shortly afterwards a grin floated in from outside, and materialised into the Cheshire Kitten.

"What are you doing here?"asked Emily, by now at her wit's end.

"I came to direct you to the Heartless Queen's court. You are to attend proceedings as a witness for the Duchess."

"What has the Duchess done?"

"That's for me to know and you to find out pumpkin. Now C'mon, or the Heartless Queen will have your head, literally."

"Oh, thanks so much Kitten, really."

"You're welcome. I'll send the co-ordinates of her house to your Wonderland-pad."

"My wonder-what?" as Emily said that a small disc fell into her palm and began to beep incessantly, directing her towards the Queen's court.

She followed the arrows flashing across the disc, scared that she might get lost with all of the twists, turns and sharp bends she was taking. Finally, she arrived at the Queen's Court. Unbeknownst to Emily, she had been steadily growing throughout the case, and had already gained a few inches.

Emily stepped into the courtroom, feeling self-conscious, as she was still dressed in her wedding clothes. Nervously she took her place next to Hotch, who gave her a small smile of courage. The court proceedings began, with the Duchess taking her place as the accused, for leaving her baby in the hands of someone incapable of looking after it. Emily, who had been nervously surveying the entire scene, stood up to defend herself, and almost knocked the chandelier from the ceiling onto the jury's head.

"I am not incapable Strauss. In fact, just because I refuse to testify against my friend, that doesn't make me incapable of taking care of a child!"

Strauss glared at her coldly before replying, "You are too tall to be in this court room Ms. Prentiss. Leave now or be executed."

"Damn it! I hate politics! Who says that I am too tall to defend my friend? Who says that is someone needs me I should just leave them, I need to know I am human and not some bitter, jaded Queen like yourself. So I don't care, have my head, because I'm bigger than you anyway." And with that, Emily flicked Strauss across the court room and onto her husband's lap. Satisfied at having beaten Strauss for once, Emily didn't notice until it was too late that many card-Andersons were crawling into her clothes and stabbing her with small letter openers. Emily was beginning to drown under all the Andersons, and couldn't break free when-

Startled at first, Emily surveyed her surroundings, and, finding nothing unusual at all, she stood up and brushed herself off. "Stupid Rabbit Hole" she cursed.

_**And that's the end of that : ) I hope you enjoyed my first one-shot FF, please R&R with any comments or criticism. Thanks for reading : D This is the second version, slight adjustments to be made, and please hit that Review button if you have the time =)**_


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